New Disease

The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of sexually transmitted disease.

This disease is contracted through dangerous and high-risk behavior. The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim (pronounced gonna re-elect him). Many victims have contracted it after having been screwed for the past 4 years, in spite of having taken measures to protect themselves from this especially troublesome disease.

Cognitive sequelae of individuals infected with Gonorrhea Lectim include, but are not limited to:

Anti-social personality disorder traits; delusions of grandeur with a distinct messianic flavor; chronic mangling of the English language; extreme cognitive dissonance; inability to incorporate new information; pronounced xenophobia; inability to accept responsibility for actions; exceptional cowardice masked by acts of misplaced bravado; uncontrolled facial smirking; ignorance of geography and history; tendencies toward creating evangelical theocracies; and a strong propensity for categorical, all-or nothing behavior.

The disease is sweeping Washington. Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed and baffled that this malignant disease originated only a few years ago in a Texas bush.

CHRISTMAS EVE CUSTOMS

The teacher was very curious about how each of her students celebrated Christmas Eve.

"Tell me Patrick, what do you do on Christmas Eve?" she asked.

Patrick addressed the class. "Well Miss, me and my twelve brothers and sisters go to midnight Mass and we sing hymns, then we come home very late and we put mince pies by the back door and hang up our stockings.

Then all excited we go to bed and wait for Father Christmas to come with all our toys."

"Very nice Patrick, now Jimmy, what do you do?"

"Well Miss, me and my sister go to Church with Mum and Dad and we sing carols and we et home ever so late. We put cookies and milk by the chimney and we hang up our stockings. We hardly sleep waiting for Santa Claus to bring our presents."

Remembering there was a Jewish boy in the class and not wanting to leave him out of the discussion, she asked, "Now Isaac, what do you do on Christmas Eve?"

"Well Miss, it's the same old thing every year. Dad comes home from the office. We all pile into the Rolls and drive to his toy factory. When we get inside we look at all the empty shelves and sing ........ "What a friend we have in Jesus". Then we go to the Bahamas."

Sometimes it's not about being entertained, but educated and informed.

TAKEN FROM THE NEW YORK TIMES:
Originally published on December 13, 2004

New drugs outfox the AIDS virus
THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

PISCATAWAY, N.J. - Researchers at Rutgers University have developed three promising drugs that they say destroy HIV, the virus that causes AIDS. The drugs, called DAPYs, mimic the virus by changing shape, which enables them to interfere with the way HIV attacks the immune system.

Tests conducted with Johnson & Johnson have shown the drug to be easily absorbed with minimal side effects. It also can be taken in one pill, in contrast to the drug cocktails now taken by AIDS patients.

"This could be it," Stephen Smith, the head of the department of infectious diseases at Saint Michael's Medical Center in Newark, told the Star-Ledger newspaper. "We're all looking for the next class of drugs."

Full details will be unveiled in early 2005, but Rutgers chemist Eddy Arnold said the new meds target reverse transcriptase, a submicroscopic protein comprising two coiled chains of amino acids. It is considered HIV's key protein.

"Reverse transcriptase is very important in the biology of AIDS," Smith said. "If you can really inhibit reverse transcriptase, you can stop AIDS."

The optimism about R278474, the most promising of the three drugs, stems from its potential to interfere with an enzyme the virus needs to copy and insert itself into a human cell.

"We're onto something very, very special," Arnold told the newspaper.

Two relatives of R278474, called TMC-120 and TMC-125, also have showed promise in clinical trials. Johnson & Johnson officials told the Ledger that the two drugs areb of major interest to them, but they did not discuss R278474.

Hold me back...

How some traditions begin......

Frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hidden the liquor, and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider pot, and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor.

He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw end of the broom. Just then the doorbell rang, and irritable Santa trudged to the door. He opened the door, and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't it a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?"

..... And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

Seems Martha's been pretty busy in prison

I'm sure the Village People are so proud...

I can sit here for days and not get anything worth posting on this new blog. Then I get 3 things sent to me today.

Disco Sqirrels is just wrong....

Never play with fireworks

You SO do not want to know the outcome of trying to shoot a rocket out your ass.

"Can't argue with that!" Department:

"Osama Bin Laden would never understand the joys of Hanukkah"

President George W. Bush in a speech at the WHite House Menorah-lighting ceremony

Holiday Humor

The man my BF has to step aside and let me have if ever given the opportunity....right, dear?

Uh, I think I might have peed my pants a tad when I came across this site. Literally, if I could have came across this sight I would have done it. Right here at work.....